When memories can live forever online , there ’s bound to be human relationship issue , so we enlisted our preferred love Dr. , Debby Herbenick , to share some advice . The first question : Is it all right to cancel the digital retention of your ex ?
A person ’s public life sentence is a pliant persona-–not life itself . If you want to delete photos , wall posts , Facebook gifts or entire Flickr account ( assuming they are your own and not your ex-husband ’s that you ’ve chop into ) , that ’s your prerogative . Often , it ’s the smart , compassionate thing to do – for yourself and others .
If you want to preserve memories for later , screenshot the paries posts and save any photos you want , placing them into a folder denounce with your ex-husband ’s name . If you ’re the obsessional type , redeem the folder to an external strong drive and take it out only when you could reckon your past from a sizable , distanced - but - appreciative perspective rather than after a nursing bottle of wine-coloured , intoxicated alone , with your firedog beside you on a Friday night and “ If You Could Read Me Mind ” play on iTunes .
If you do n’t want your X to take your profile clear - up the incorrect way , permit him or her know that you ’re sore to , and appreciative of , the past you had together but that you need to move on .
cleansing shop also makes elbow room for raw relationships . Before Facebook , masses never saw 100 picture of their date with their ex unless they were freaky types who kept such pic framed and plastered all over their house . novel partners- – and you , too-–deserve the chance to envisage yourselves together making photo and memories of your own . Just endeavor to not set out every story with the kinship version of band camp ( i.e. , “ One meter , when my ex and I … . ” ) .
interpret more ofDr . Debby ’s relationship advice here .
Debby Herbenick , Ph.D. is a Research Scientist and Associate Director ofThe Center for Sexual Health Promotionat Indiana University , a sexual health pedagogue atThe Kinsey Instituteand author ofBecause It feel Good : A Woman ’s Guide to Sexual Pleasure and Satisfaction . She blogs atMySexProfessor.com .
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