Now that their twin boysSander Vaughn and Silas Rhysare 13 months old, their dadsShaun TandScott Blokkerhave learned how to be a winning parenting team — but it took a little time.
Posing alongside their sons in a family photo shoot forParentsmagazine’s February cover, the celebrity fitness trainer and his husband of six years get candid about the ups and downs of the first year of parenthood.
“It was terrible,” admits Shaun T with a laugh, describing his and Blokker’s dynamic during the first four months of the boys’ lives. “We got into more fights than we’d ever had in our entire relationship.”
Amanda Pratt for Parents magazine
After being born prematurely at 32 weeks, Silas and Sander gave their dads a run for their money with constant feedings that brought the couple “no more than two hours of sleep at a time for weeks in a row,” says Blokker.
It was a rude awakening for the new fathers, who had expected a different reality before their final night at the hospital, ahead of whenthey finally brought the boys homealmost three weeks after their arrival on Nov. 17, 2017.
“On their last night there, we had no monitors, no nurses, just us,” Shaun T, 40, tellsParents. “I remember thinking, ‘This will be a piece of cake.’ I was so wrong. They cried nonstop!”
Shaun T and Scott Blokker.Amanda Pratt for Parents magazine
Silas and Sander came from the same egg donor, while Silas is from Blokker’s sperm and Sander is from Shaun T’s.
But theprocess was a lengthy (and expensive) one, as the couple spent thousands of dollars on 12 attempts from a total of six egg donors, five surrogates and two doctors.
“We went through all the things that couples struggling with fertility go through: tests, doubt, grief, not knowing, waiting,” Blokker says.
Shaun T and family coverParents‘ February issue.Amanda Pratt for Parents magazine
Regardless of the challenges year one of fatherhood has brought the couple — Shaun T who “brings the fun” while Blokker “[does] all the planning,” the latter says — they have done their best to heed the words of wisdom from other parents who came before them.
“I’ve received two great pieces of advice,” says the Insanity workout mastermind. “Scott’s dad told me, ‘You’re not coming into the babies’ world. They’re coming into yours,’ and that made me eager to show them the life we live.”
“The second was from my grandfather, who was married to my grandmother for 56 years,” Shaun T continues. “He said, ‘Never go to bed angry,’ and we don’t. The connectedness you feel at the end of the day is the driving force for how you wake up the next day, soevery night we fall asleep holding hands.”
Does that calming force mean they’ll have the 11 kids Blokker once told his husband he wanted? “Hell to the no!” Shaun T says with a laugh, but he does admit, “I think we could do this again.”
source: people.com
